I think I’ve got it all together. I know, many people say no one has it all together, and in many respects they are right. No one is exempt from challenges, no one has figured out the answer to every question, and everyone makes plenty of mistakes. But instead of saying that I don’t have it all figured out, I would rather change my definition of what that means.

I am a responsible person who meets almost all of my obligations in a timely manner.  I set goals and I achieve a lot of them. I’m improving as a person. So I think I’ve got it all together. Now, sometimes my house is a disaster, my kids are snarky, I cry, I let my husband do all the dishes and I don’t help, and I forget something rather important. I’m not perfect. But I feel better and do more if I feel like I’m top of things and like I’ve got it all under control.

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We will never live up to the all standards that we can set for ourselves. There’s always someone better, more popular, cuter clothes to wear, and better ways to do makeup.  Sometimes I feel I don’t commit to a lifestyle enough. I’m awkward, interested in all the wrong things, and don’t agree with the right politics. My house isn’t pretty, my garden is weedy, I have too many kids or not enough, my career interests are foolish, my crafts messy, I am never good enough.

That’s just a rotten way to live. A Facebook post from a while ago reminded me of a better way. A woman was lamenting that she was very far from the lifestyle she wanted for herself, and the comments filled up with really good advice:

• Don’t compare yourself
• Go slow and be patient
• Just do what you can
• Life can be hard
• Do what works for you, it doesn’t have to match anybody else
• Slow and imperfect progress is still progress
• Just pick one thing you can accomplish every day
• You can get burned out if you try too much
• Find help from others

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